And So It Goes

These days have started to drag along. Waking and sleep begin to blur around the edges, and every step is torture as it leads me further away from bed. I came home and crashed on the couch after work and had naps broken into by sneezes. Some allergen descended upon my sinus cavities as I was approaching town and has managed to wear out its welcome by staying into the night. My eyes itch but my fear of Visine has prompted more dramatic methods of relief. Forcing myself to cry has not only been soothing but theraputic as well. (Because I don't cry enough, you know) I hash out made up story lines and much too realistic ones as well and find the ensuing tears to be incredibly comforting.
I got a few phone calls tonight from friends who love me. It's always nice to hear their voices but I much prefer the talking they do to faces rather than phones. As I walked to my car after school, with Elliot Smith whispering his sad thoughts in my ears, I began to dread the day when telephone voices will be all that remains of those friends. I cannot beg them to stay but I much prefer that they don't go. I suppose I fear that at the rate people have been running from this city I will have no one to leave behind myself. I have fantasies about beating them to the punch and leaving before my time, but I think that will only succeed in getting myself lost in a world I already don't know my way through.
My Communications on the Internet teacher has granted me a two day reprieve from the morning drudgery of his class. I'm excited about the possibility to sleep an extra two hours tomorrow morning and even longer on Thursday. I'll take the time to fight off what I fear is the flu and to linger a bit longer in the dreams I love so much. My eyes are growing impatient and I think I might get an early start on a "full" night's rest.
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