Wednesday, March 13, 2002
When did this day fall to pieces? When did the glory pass away? Maybe it was around the same time God put up the "Out to Lunch" sign and left me to fight the demon on my shoulder. God and I have been incommunicado for a few months now and I'm scared. This is unlike any valley I have seen before and I'm unsure on where to begin climbing out. Days in this canyon are full of smiles and accomplishments and the choice to pitch my tent and stay awhile is tempting. At night, though, the monuments of the day turn into monstrous shadows and the emptiness of abandonment returns to haunt me. I think I might feel better if I were able to pray, but every part of me seems to have forgotten how. The warmth of God's presence has faded and it's terrifying to be on the dark side of His face. My insides are dead and I don't know how to bring them back to life.
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